WORST ALBUMS OF 2012 //

Yeah, yeah, it’s all well and good saying what albums we liked this year. And fair enough, some were really good. But lest we forget, 2012 was also fraught with complete and utter stinkers. Here are our top five worst albums of the year, along with a brief reminder of what we thought at the time.

 


 

5. THE TING TINGS

SOUNDS FROM NOWHERESVILLE


“They’ve spent four years worrying about what everyone thinks about them. It won’t take anywhere near that long to find out no-one gives a shit.”

 


 

4. HERVÉ

PICK ME UP, CALM ME DOWN, SORT ME OUT


“Come back Crookers, all is forgiven. This album’s got more drops than a shit juggler. We’re off to the fidget house with a can of petrol and a load of Garrys.”

 


 

3. LOSTPROPHETS

WEAPONS


“The first track features the band going “woah woah woah” for large portions of the song, obviously a complete departure from their avant-garde early work. The second track sees Watkins crooning “bite that lip cause you know your tongue is a gun and your brain is a trigger” … it also features the band going “woah woah woah” a hell of a lot, and is obviously a complete departure from the more avant-garde first track.”

 


 

2. BOYS NOIZE

OUT OF THE BLACK


“In the halcyon days of 2006, when ZZT, Soulwax, Erol Alkan and Boys Noize were re-arranging Crack’s perceptions of electro music, we were happy. We had girlfriends. We discovered the joy of staying up all night. The problem is, some of the above protagonists got really fucking lazy. 2ManyDJs roll out the same seven-year-old set every time you see them, and on latest offering Out of the Black Boys Noize has created a record so devoid of ‘moments’ or intelligence, you have to wonder if he hadn’t released it on his own label whether someone might have had a word.”

 


 

1. MUSE 

THE 2ND LAW


“… the worst kind of daytime Radio One ‘dubstep’ fare which caters for the absolute lowest common denominator and displays a band jumping on a dirty, dirty bandwagon without truly understanding who they’re going to be sitting next to and that there’s an idiot behind the wheel. They presumably think they’re embracing the future. They’re not. They’re embracing an extremely short-term vision of the future, a momentary blot on the copy book of music, a sonic Fifty Shades of Grey that cannot be forgotten soon enough.”

 


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